As If You Didn't Know

Once upon a time I was smart... I think we can even venture down the road of intelligent (doesn't the added letters make it sound more official?) Of course I only realized how important it was to pay attention after I spent the first bits of my life running away from anything that took up any of my social time--but that's for another day. I love to learn new things, soaking up information like a sponge. Unfortunately I can't seem to remember things like I used to. It's probably years of no sleep, or staying at home for the past 5 years with my children, or because my sentences consists of:

"Don't touch that."
"Don't put that in your mouth."
"Don't roll your eyes at me."
"Go to bed."

Do you see any word in that dialogue longer than 5 letters? Nope, me either...sigh.

And after nine years of parenting, I can still be SO dense. Sometimes to a point where it's just pathetic. So I thought I would write down some of the most important things that I have learned in the last nine years. And if I forget them I can just scroll down my posts and re-read them. Look at me getting all intellectual again.
1. Stop scrubbing your floors, Jonathan is going to rush in as soon as they dry, NEEDING to go to the bathroom with no time to remove his mud caked rubber boots.

2. Stop staying up past 9:00. Alyson has telepathically learned to sense the minute you hit REM sleep and will wake the instant your body foolishly thought it was going to get rest.

3. Stop worrying about the teenage years with Destyni. She has already learned to roll her eyes, spin off attitude and look at you like your from a different planet--your too late to worry. You should have started the minute the doctor said, "It's a girl."

4. Every time you see a baby and wonder if you should have "just one more." KICK YOURSELF!!

5. Stop buying white clothes!!!!

6. Stop trying to get ahead-you won't!  You spend too much time organizing and planning when you could be watching TV, or better yet drinking wine.

7. Embrace your van. Remember, you can stick the kids in the very back, turn up the music and not hear them yelling, sulking, or fighting.


Now I just have to remember that I actually made this list and I should stay ahead of the game.

Sugar..Oh Honey Honey

What an amazing weekend! I didn't realize how much I needed a long weekend until I was caught up in it. Ahh...it was great! There was sleeping in, lazy days, BBQ'ed dinner, and enough chocolate to feed a small country.

Destyni loves to celebrate any holiday. She loves making presents at Christmas, loves to help choose and make her costume for Halloween. She helps Scott and I make breakfast in bed for each other on Mother or Father's Day. On your birthday she always makes these beautiful homemade cards that she has worked on for hours. Destyni is very artistic and loves anything crafty. Getting closer to Easter this is what I found upstairs on the whiteboard we use to write messages to each other.

She is so creative.

The weather was beautiful most of the long weekend so we were able to get out and enjoy the sunshine.

And then the sugar started taking over...

We all had so much fun! I hope you all had a great relaxing Easter weekend as well!!!!
xx

And She's Off.....

What a day!!! Heart stealing going on all over this place!!!

Alyson woke up this morning and one of the first words out of her mouth was "Da-Da!!" I wish that I had a video of Alyson saying it and then of Scott hearing it. It was enough to make my heartstrings sing like a choir of a thousand people. I don't know what's more exciting, seeing or hearing something new that one of our children do or watching Scott see it for the first time.

There is something to say about the love that fathers have for their children!

On top of saying "Da-Da" she also decided that tonight she will learn to crawl. She has been rocking back and forth and bum scooting for some time now but she was all out crawling tonight. It was one of the funniest things I have ever seen any of my children doing. Destyni and Jonathan crawled with ease, right knee, left hand, left knee, right hand. No thinking required. But not Alyson, no she's very cautious of how and when she moves her limbs. It's like watching a sloth try and crawl, so slow. It's almost as if you are watching her in slow motion.

I can't wait to see what the next few days will bring when she realizes that she will be able to follow Destyni and Jonathan around.

It's going to be a busy Easter Weekend!!!

I Don't Like You

I don't like you. It's nothing personal, it's me.

I am not sure if I was born without the ability to like, or if it is something that my heart thought about and decided against it. This may make me sound standoffish, but it's not that at all.

I love....I don't know how to like. I love...with my entire being....


 I love my children,

 I love Scott,

 I love people in general.
 I love sunrises, sunsets and Sundays. I love shopping, spending time with friends, cooking and red wine.

 I love all things chocolate as long as it's milk chocolate. I love reading, writing and learning. I love starting new projects and never finishing them. I love candles.
There isn't a lot of grey in my life (not even in my closet!!!) because it's all so black and white for me.

Which of course makes me a romantic... I believe in soul mates. I really do. I believe in happy endings and almost anything sentimental will make me tear up.

When bad things happen in the world I get a physical pain in my heart, an actual pain. And there are times when I just feel empty.

I don't see things the way most people see things. This can get confusing and frustrating, for me and for the person who is trying to deal with me. School was hell  not so fun. When asked questions I would write down my answer, totally believing that it was the right answer. It only took a few years for me to realize that my answers (if based on my own thoughts) were most likely never going to be correct, or remotely close to what my teachers were looking for.

So I stuck my head in the sand...a fine place to be. But as I get older I am learning to embrace who I really am. Seeing the world from a different view allows me to gain a different perspective. It is given me the experience to be able to teach my children how it's more than okay to be different.

Does anyone else feel like this? Are you grasping it and loving it? Pretty amazing isnt' it?

xx

Easter

I am in love with a lot of things....husband, kids, pooch, chocolate. Memories of Easter past....

Until We Meet Again...

On Saturday, April 16th it will be the day that I will have lived longer than knowing my dad. He passed away fifteen years ago. I kind of feel stuck, not wanting to cross that threshold. Staying right here, at this date, just so that I won't have to know that feeling. The missing him, the wanting him in my life. As time goes on there is so much that I want to tell him, that I want to show him. I can't believe how much I want him in my life right now.

I want Dad to know Scott. I want to be able to come into my living room and see the two of them cheering on the Canadians, sharing beer and talking about life. I want him to know that Scott keeps me safe, protected and makes me laugh every single day.

 I want him to know Destyni  -to sit with her and explain hockey to her, play soccer outside with her and have running races.  And she would never ever win, and it would be fine. I want her to go to the farm and see a baby calf being born.

I want him to meet Alex. To be able to see how amazing having a step-child is. I want him to listen to Alex's stories and get caught up in the excitement like we all do when he talks. I want my Dad to teach Alex about farming and take him to the fields and explain how crops grow.

I want him to feed off Jonathan's energy. I want to see Jonathan walking hand in hand with his grandfather, looking up to him and knowing that at that single moment every thing in the world is as it should be. I want Jonathan to learn all my Dad knew about fixing cars.

I want Alyson to be the one who instills my father into younger years. I want Dad to have to chase her around and be utterly exhausted when we leave from visiting. I want Alyson to learn what history is and how important it is to know where you come from. I want my Dad to teach her that.

I know these things aren't going to happen, I know that everything is suppose to happen for a reason. But sometimes the memories feel like they are fading, the sharpness of an event seems duller. And sometimes its just sad.

There hasn't been one day in fifteen years that you haven't crossed my mind. That my heart doesn't yearn to hear your voice, my arms don't ache to hug you and my soul doesn't know that there is a piece missing.

I love you Dad...Until we meet again....xoxo.

Windy Windy Day

Yesterday was a great day. It was 21 degrees (69 F) outside!!! For this time of year...well let's just say I was in HEAVEN!!!

Unfortunately it was too windy to take Alyson out to play. It was incredible. One of those windy days that you just have to go out into your yard, pull your hair out of your ponytail and let the air whip through it.... Have you tried this? I could see the tree tops lashing around before the air made it's way down to me. It's an amazing feeling. So exhilarating!! I love thunderstorms, I love dancing in the rain and I love crazy windy days!!

And the best part--laundry dries in NO TIME! Unless you have to go searching for your clothes all around your neighborhood, but hey what a great ice breaker for the neighbors that you haven't met yet. Number 1 reason I DO NOT hang out knickers!!!

I did say that I couldn't take Alyson out to "play", I didn't say that I couldn't get a few pictures of her reaction to the wind. Oh, I love that red hair!!!

WAHOO!!!!

What a GREAT way to start a week. I just read that Jeri Lynne from The Knight Life has awarded me this!!!

This is my very first award and I am THRILLED to bits!!! So a huge thanks to Jeri Lynne for taking the time to read my blog. You made my day =)

To accept this award a few small details need to be followed.

1. Tell seven things about yourself.
2. Pass along the award to fifteen other bloggers.

Okay seven things about myself.

1. I love to dance.
2. When I am alone in a vehicle I blare the music, ridiculously loud.
3. I love sunsets.
4. I can play the violin.
5. I could probably live on a chocolate diet.
6. I still get butterflies when Scott walks through the door.
7. I rarely get jokes but laugh like I do, only to have someone have to explain them to me afterwards.

And my chosen fifteen blogs that I LOVE are:

Another cookie, please!
Narragansett No. 7
Walking Contradiction
Absolutely Narcissism
1 FUNKY WOMAN
Clean Sheets on Sunday
Confessions of a Corn Fed Girl
BEAN
The Odd Duck
My Blog is Boring
O. is Me
Post Road Vintage
My Crazy Life
Surviving and Thriving in Mom-dom
Focus Jennie!

I can't say enough about these blogs!! They are funny, touching and inspirational!!!
Happy Monday!!
xx

Smooth Talker

Jonathan owns my heart. Okay all my children own my heart, they are utterly adorable in their own sweet special way. Jonathan has learned how to play me. Like a charm. It was as if he was born with this innate ability to know exactly what to say, when to say it and how to say it. The girls own me with their sweetness, their innocence and the special things we get to do together, cause we're all girls.(yep, still referring to myself as a girl).

Now Jonathan is a whole new world of knowing how to own Mommy. And is his Daddy proud. Example--We are all sitting at the dinner table when Destyni's friend Brooke shows up for a play date. The second she walks in Jonathan sits up in his chair, "Hi Brookie."

Desytni and Brooke are leaving to go and play outside and as Brooke walks by Jonathan looks at her, "Bye Sweets." I nearly choke on my dinner, but it doesn't end there!! He looks at Scott, nods his head and fist pumps him!!! SERIOUSLY!! What the hell!!??? I don't think Scott could have been any prouder.

I have been to the grocery store with Jonathan while he asks our cashier how their day is going, and listens while they tell him. As we leave he always tells them to have a good day. He also knows that his manners will get him on our good graces so he's a manners hog. He uses them every chance he gets.

As I am tucking him in last night for bed I look back to blow him a kiss before walking out his door. He's there, laying in his bed, all tucked in, with those beautiful blue eyes. He blinks once, and says. "Mom, you're gorgeous." This child is 4!!! And he knows more tricks than some grown ups!!

This child-he's some kind of wonderful!

Snap Happy Heaven!!

I had already posted that my husband bought me my dream camera.  I am in love. It's been so fun reading all about what it can do, and realizing what I can't do. But I am so excited to figure it all out!!!

So of course a new camera means loads and loads of new pics-here are some of my favorites so far =)

Hope you're all having a fantastic Monday!!
xx

It's Another Day

Have you checked out Google? It has to be a good day, it's a day that revolves around ICE CREAM!!!

It was a bad week. I felt as if I was falling apart at the seams and it was evident. I remember in a fog of Tylenol and lack of sleep saying to Scott, "I am an emotional basket case so if I get upset about anything just  ignore me."

Remember my camera breaking , well Scott went out yesterday and bought me a new one. My dream camera. Although I am still trying to figure it all out, but here are some pics from the weekend so far.



My Sweets

This weekend I may have went to bed early both nights, wasn't able to do anything remarkably fun but today I have clothes out on the line (BED SHEETS!!!!!) I am able to take super cute pictures of the kids AND I can have ice cream guilt free!! It's a sundae Sunday!!!
xx

Breaking up...and down.

Uggg...

What more is there to say? Tuesday was Monday Part 2. And I had enough of Monday Part 1 by about lunchtime on Monday.

Tuesday was one of those days that just kept kicking me down. I thought it was going to start off okay. My plan was to go into DMV first thing in the morning to try and beat the traffic.(My first mistake)  One of my least favorite places to go ever! And I had Alyson and Jonathan with me. This was something I had to mentally prepare myself for. Make sure I had enough supplies (diapers, wipes snacks) in case we were there for more than a few days hours. I walked in and there was two people being waited on, I was next in line. I looked around to make sure that I was at the right place. It was too good to be true, right? Then another worker came out and asked if she could help me. I waited LESS THAN 30 SECONDS. I bet that is record for DMV. I told her I needed to switch my license from one province to another--at exactly this time my day turned to hell.

She had a very sorrowful look on her face, "We can't do that here."
Apparently only certain offices can do certain things..Of  course. I was so glad that I was up, out the door with both kids dressed and ready, my suitcases of snacks and toys for NOTHING. There was no way his trip was going to get the best of me...so I grabbed a hot chocolate... I needed something sweet to put with my sour morning. Totally fair, right?

Then I went home trying to recover the day and get some more appointments settled. I made some calls in regards to getting our new health cards.I scheduled some appointments for the next few days-all of which had to be cancelled because I have no "legal" documentation stating my married name. And I need Scott with me verifying that we actually live here...permanently. WOW---Ontario you just brought the women's movement back about 30 years. Congrats!
 Notice how sour I am?

I tried to make my day better by taking super cute pictures of the kids. Then I dropped my camera, and broke it. And then I cried, just a little.

So I decided to give up the day and crawl into bed, where Scott convinced me I would be a new person the next day. Nothing a little sleep won't cure. Little sleep..literally. 3:30am was when Alyson decided to get up...for the day. And her next nap was at 9:30. How does she do it? I don't have that amount of energy! Destyni and Jonathan combined don't have that much energy!

Last night, same thing. Alyson awoke at 3:24am and finally went down for a nap a half hour ago, it's 9:20. Sigh..So I did some research...thinking that Alyson was nocturnal..nope she's definitely cathemeral. Do you have a child that suffers from this?

So I am hoping to break up with my 3:00 affair... before I break down.