Goodbye Ordinary Numbers

Dearest Destyni,

My precious baby girl. Tonight is the eve of all ordinary birthdays. After toddler-hood, your age was just a number. After midnight tonight, you are not just any number, you are a teenager, you are my teenager.

My sweet Princess, you are the sole person who has taken me from being "just a twenty year old" to "Mommy". You are everything I ever did right in the world. As tomorrow slowly creeps up, my mind keeps flooding with pictures of your life. They seem to rush in without any warning, and leaving me with tears in my eyes and happiness bursting from my heart. I don't ever know if you can begin to understand what you've created by being you, but my child, you have created magic.

This is the beginning of the letting go stage. The age when I have to slowly let you go out into the world, without holding your hand, and guiding you to all the right answers. I know I have to let you venture into unknown territories, and I have to let you make mistakes so you will know how to learn from them. This will be my hardest role as your mother.

Today I will promise you everything I have ever promised you while you flipped in my belly, while you slept in my arms, while you splashed in the tub, climbed the couch, gazed at me reading to you, drove in the car singing at the top of our lungs, holding you as you cried, danced with you, and rocked you back and forth. I promise to love you forever. I promise to always be your confidant, even when I'm not able to be your friend. Know this more than ever, no matter what happens, I am here. Behind you cheering you on, beside you, pushing you forward and in front of you, guiding you.

To my almost thirteen year old, I have never met anyone like you in my entire life. I don't think I ever shall. Happy Birthday darling!

"Breathe deep. Talk slow.

Walk soft. Let go.

Give big. Take less.

Don't count. Just guess.

Act fair. Think long.

Laugh loud. Sing strong.

Plan bold. Dream far.

Feel loved. You are."